Sometimes Good People Make Bad Choices...

 I just read this on Instagram and it hit my heart.

I've always tried to do the "right" thing.  I have to admit there have been many times when I did what "Reia" wanted and not what God wanted.

I'm very thankful for this statement.  I am actually not my bad choices.  Thank you Instagram and "Power of Positivity" for reminding me that we're all human and we often "miss the mark".

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

Oct. 27th ~ National American Beer Day

I think I lean toward American Beers every day but the thought that today is "National American Beer Day" gave me pause for thought.

To celebrate I decided to buy a beer I hadn't tried yet.  Being very frugal, I chose one that had an Ibotta rebate attached.

My Bill always loved Miller Lite.  Once we got married it turned into Milwaulkee's Best or Keystone.  Every now and then we'd splurge but usually it was what we could afford.

One time we bought a keg because I'd "run the numbers" and it would be cheaper to have a keg.  It was an absolutely wonderful couple of days until the keg ran dry and the party ended.  We - umm, I - didn't do that again.

Today brought back a lot of memories of drinking beer with my best friend who was also my husband.  I'm not sure what he's drinking in Heaven but I'm behaving myself and trying something new on "National American Beer Day".

On a side note - thinking of American beer always makes me think of "Nati" - Natural Light beer and then my mind goes on to Walker Hayes' song "Fancy Like" which then makes me think of my daughter Ginger and her husband Adam.  (Don't you love the way my mind works?")

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

Widowhood ~ God is with me

This week has been a tough week.  It was filled with some super things and some disappointments.  I found myself struggling.  I miss my husband - I really, really do.  This week was a time when his wisdom and down to earth thinking along with some bad words would have solved a few things for me.

Today I cried my way through the Spanish Communion song.  I didn't mean to but God touched my heart and there we were.  We sang one of my favorite songs - Pescador de Hombres.  As we sang, the words "O Lord, with your eyes set upon me, gently smiling, you have spoken my name; all I longed for I have found by the water, at your side, I will seek other shores", I fell apart.

 

Knowing that Jesus was speaking my name and I was surrounded by some of the dearest people I've ever known...I just cried and cried.  I try to stay strong - I think I've done a good job.  Today - the love of God, the love of my church family - it was my un-doing and I'll forever be grateful!

Thank you - all of you who love me on the good days and the bad days.  I'm so very blessed to have you in my life!

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

The Songs in My Life ~ Thy Word is A Lamp Unto my Feet

 "Thy Word is Lamp Unto My Feet" - (Psalm 119:105)

I have sung this song so often over the years.  It never fails to speak to my heart and declare my love for God and my trust in Him.  (Psalm 119:105)

Photo by daniel petreikis on Unsplash

I spent a while pondering the thought of two lights.  I wondered why there were two lights.  Then one night I was outside and there was a tall light - it was helping me see the entire path ahead of me.  I also had my flashlight to see what was right in front of me and then it hit me.  Two lights!  I get it!

Photo by Julia Florczak on Unsplash

I was so thankful at that moment for a wonderful Heavenly Father that gave us His Word as a "lamp" for our feet and a "light" for our path!

I'll never be the same after that moment.

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

The Songs In My Life ~ I'll Never Be Lonely Again, Never Again

I'm doing good.  I miss my Bill - a lot - but I'm doing good.

As I walked out of my pantry tonight, I thought, "I'm on my own, but I'm not alone."

Photo by Quino Al on Unsplash

I think every Christian that lives a daily life loving God and thankful for what Jesus did for us on the Cross shares this feeling.  I found myself singing an old song - used to sing it as a young child.  It means even more to me now.

Here's the YouTube link and the lyrics are below.  Just as I sang this as a child who loved Jesus with all of her heart - I'm still singing it.  I'll never be lonely again, never again.  You don't have to be either.

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=swm6Bs1TaQ4

Lonely days and lonely nights,

Filled with despair,

Caused me to long for

Someone to care;

Then I heard Christ say to me;

"This promise I've made:

Lo! I am with you

Now and forever,

Be not afraid."

Chorus

I'll never be lonely again,

Never again,

For I have opened

My heart's door to Him.

So I'll brush away the tears

And forget my

Foolish fears

I'll never be lonely again,

Never again.

If you're longing for a friend,

Loving and true,

Turn to the Savior

He waits for you;

He will do the same for you

As He did for me;

He'll never leave you,

Never forsake you,

Trust Him and see.

Chorus

I'll never be lonely again,

Never again,

For I have opened

My heart's door to Him.

So I'll brush away the tears

And forget my

Foolish fears

I'll never be lonely again,

Never again.

My Husband was a Genius...Logical

I loved having my girls and their families visit after my husband passed.  It was a good reunion and they helped me with a lot of things around the house.  One monstrous thing to deal with was the huge, gigantic desk Bill built for himself.  His favorite saying was..."I could sit on it."  Considering he was 250# that was quite a statement.

I loved something my son-in-law said as he took it apart for me.  He said, "Bill put it together so logically, it was easy to take apart logically."  That made my heart very happy.  Thank you, Bill, for your genius.  You did everything so well and I love you for it.

Thank you, Adam, for getting the huge desk out and giving me a new office to work in and teach in.  Life is good.

Thanks for visiting!  Reia

Thankful for...Home Hospice

It's been a journey.  In the almost 4 years since Bill found out he had lung cancer, he's had 6 months without any new growth.  Every time he said "I'm not doing a new treatment."  Every time he told the doctor, "I'll give it a try."  The treatments have been rough on him.  He's given more than the old "college try".

Last month he finally said, "I'm tired.  No more treatments."  He wanted to just come home and be.  I told him I wasn't going to be the only "eyes" on him cause I'd have all kinds of things happening to him - all non-existent of course.  I told him I wanted the Hospice company we'd used for mama in 2016.  They were good, caring people.  I think he decided that would be easier on him than me bugging him daily.

We have a wonderful nurse that comes in twice a week now.  He doesn't have to go to Liberty Regional for weekly labs any more and he doesn't have to go for chemo on Thursdays now.

For a bad situation - life is good.  I say that to encourage those who love my Bill.  He's good - he's at peace with himself - he's...at peace and so am I.  I'm not sure how long he'll be on this side of Heaven but we're making the most of his time here.

Photo by frank mckenna on Unsplash

For any others in this position - I pray for you.  I pray for peace, for time together, for caring people in your life.

Thanks for visiting  ~ Reia

Prolonging Life ~ What Does it Mean?

So we're in the stage of "prolonging life".  We called quits on "curing" and now we're "prolonging life".  I thought I'd be a widow much earlier so being in this stage is better than I thought.  I still have today and maybe tomorrow with an incredible man, husband, father and most of all - best friend.

Photo by Greg Rakozy on Unsplash

I'm not sure where you're at in life.  I hope that you're making the most of every day.  Loving the people in your life and not worrying about the people that don't make your life better.

Photo by MARK ADRIANE on Unsplash

Wherever you are - make the most of every day.  Love those that make your life better.  Pray for everyone in your life.  Be thankful for the extra days you didn't think you'd have.  Live!

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

The Songs in My Life ~ He Will Hold Me Fast

I always have a song going in my head and heart.  For me it's praying and a constant communication with my Heavenly Father.  Last week I realized - I don't have a song.

So I prayed.  Father, I need a song right now.  I found Selah's version of an old hymn..."He Will Hold Me Fast".

Photo by Ivanna Blinova on Unsplash

It's perfect for my "right now".  The present is fraught with uncertainty and the future is also.  But..."Raised with Him to endless life - He will hold me fast.  Till our faith is turned to sight..."

Photo by Josh Boot on Unsplash

Yes, this is exactly how I'm feeling right now.  I'm not sure about the future, I'm not even sure about today.  Now I have a song for what I know in my heart - He will hold me fast.

He will hold me fast - He will hold me fast - For my Savior loves me so -

He will hold me fast.

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

For more information on this song, visit - https://hymnary.org/text/when_i_fear_my_faith_will_fail

The Songs in My Life ~ Wonderful, Merciful Savior

I know I just wrote about this song.  I haven't been able to get away from it.
I guess when you have a song to sing...you have to sing it.

Photo by Paul Zoetemeijer on Unsplash

So I did.

I found some beautiful pictures on www.unsplash.com to go with my recording.
(I placed the credits in the YouTube comments.)

From my heart to yours  - hope you enjoy my cover of Selah's "Wonderful, Merciful Savior".

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

What If You Could Have It All ~ My Friend I Do...

I can't tell you how often I've heard that phrase over my 60 plus years of life.  To which I pondered - what is "having it ALL"?

I've seen people chase the material things only to find they don't fulfill - they don't satisfy - they're empty.

Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

My mother often pressed upon me this phrase - "the true meaning of life".  It stuck.

Each of us may have a different definition of "the true meaning of life".  Mine's all about "that which money can't buy".  The love of God, the love of family, the love of friends, the love of a church family - the rest doesn't actually matter.

I always fall back on Micah 6:8 - "He has shown you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God."

Kathleen Carnali - Micah 6:8

So when I look at people - I don't notice the clothes - I notice the face and the eyes. Are they smiling eyes or hurting eyes?

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

May we all act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with our God.

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

The Beatles ~ There are places I remember...

...some are gone and some remain.  "In My Life" - a song that rips my heart and makes me ugly cry.  In My Life

I guess you could say I'm a "feeling" person.  I have a long memory for the people crossing my path in life.  Right, wrong, indifferent - I remember people.

Along my path of finding "Mr. Right" - my present husband - I found a lot of "not quite right but you touched my life" people.  Most parted ways because we weren't a good fit.  Of those that crossed my path - some have departed this earth way too early and some found the "right fit" that wasn't me.

When I met my present husband, we had long talks about songs/music/life.  I told him I was trying to find a song the Beatles had sung.  He found it for me, bought the cd for me as a gift and I sat in the silence of my bedroom - in the dark - and let the song flow over me - breaking me down - healing me.  I cried ugly tears as the song washed over me and I was so thankful for this man - my Bill - that provided this private healing time.

"Some have gone and some remain
All these places have their moments

With lovers and friends I still can recall

Some are dead and some are living

In my life I've loved them all

But of all these friends and lovers

There is no one compares with you

And these memories lose their meaning

When I think of love as something new

Though I know I'll never lose affection

For people and things that went before

I know I'll often stop and think about them

In my life I love you more"

...and I have for over 25 years.

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

The Songs in My Life ~ I'm Already There

I'm going through a list of my favorite songs.  We're in a new normal with Bill's lung cancer/lung problems.  I'd forgotten about this song.  I'm reminded so often of why I fell in love with him and why I stay in love with him.  This song is one of the many reminders.

I'm Already There by Lonestar

Bill's work was in the Metal Cutting Industry.  If a machine cut metal, he's seen it.  He knew how to write the software to make the CNCs (I'm sure you know this but just in case - Computer Numerical Controllers) tell the machine to do what it was supposed to do (simplified version and probably not exactly correct).

He was often called into a plant as a troubleshooter when machines were down.  He was once told that if he didn't get a machine going soon he was going to "shut down the whole GM line".  You can imagine what he said to that comment.

Anyway - I'd drive him to the airport on Monday and pick him up on Friday only to do it again the next week.  After he'd hurt his back and was finally home, I heard this song and just fell apart.  I promised myself and him that I'd do anything legal and moral to keep him home with me.  It's been over 20 years and I've kept my promise so far.

Promises made - Promises kept.  Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

Sweet Southern Comfort ~ I'm home

My growing up years were in Central Florida.

My young woman - raising a family years were in Northern Virginia.  The first time I glimpsed the view of DC - my breath was taken away.  What a magical place.

Photo by Casey Horner on Unsplash

Then it was Nashville - didn't think I'd like Nashville but I knew I could make it there as a single Mom.  (I did like Nashville and I met my Bill there.)

Photo by Tanner Boriack on Unsplash

A few other moves and we landed back in Northern Virginia.  Girls were grown and I kept feeling the call to get back to my "Deep South" roots.

Every time I heard Buddy Jewell sing "Sweet Southern Comfort" I wanted to get "home".

Sweet Southern Comfort

We've been back nearly 15 years and it feels like yesterday.  It's my "Happy Place".  I drive by and can say, "that's where Traci was born" and "that's where Ginger was born".  Yes, my "Happy Place".

Photo by Drew Beamer on Unsplash

Small town - Magnolia trees - hot, hot, hot days - 6 weeks of winter - beach 90 minutes away - SEC - I'm home!

Thank you, Lord, for the many journeys I've had and all of the people I met to include my Bill.  Thank you even more for getting me back to my "Deep South"!

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

The Books in My Life ~ Practicing the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence

Christians commonly remember Brother Lawrence for the intimacy he expressed concerning his relationship to God as recorded in a book compiled after his death, the classic Christian text, The Practice of the Presence of God.   My version and the one I read as a teenager is "Practicing the Presence of God".

This book changed my life when I was a teenager.  I realized I could converse with God 24/7.  I didn't have to be at a specific place or wait until a specific time.  I've been conversing ever since.

The book is a collection of conversations, letters and writings of Brother Lawrence of the Resurrection (c. 1614 – 12 February 1691).  Brother Lawrence served as a lay brother in a Carmelite monastery in Paris.

An excerpt - p. 41 of my version.  "As for how things are with me now, I can't explain it sufficiently.  I have no suffering or worries about my spiritual state because I have no will of my own.  I only have the will of God.  I try to accomplish his will at all times and in all things."

For a book originally published in 1691 and 1694 it resonates today with me.  Join me in "Practicing the Presence of God" throughout your daily life.

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

The Songs in My Life ~ I Need Thee Every Hour

How wonderful when my "work life" coincides with my personal life.  You want to learn how to play "I Need Thee Every Hour"?  Why, yes, let's do that!  I can't think of a song I sing more because..."I need Thee every hour...!"

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

Enjoy this version... by Fernando Ortego  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZIMDcgrF-Q&list=RDtZIMDcgrF-Q&index=1

I need Thee every hour,

Most gracious Lord.

No tender voice like thine,

Can peace afford.

I need Thee, oh I need Thee

Every hour I need Thee!

Oh, bless me now, my Savior,

I come to Thee!

I need Thee every hour,

Stay thou nearby.

Temptations lose their pow'r

When thou are nigh.

I need Thee, oh I need Thee

Every hour I need Thee!

Oh, bless me now, my Savior,

I come to Thee!

I need Thee every hour,

In joy or pain.

Come quickly and abide,

Or life is vain.

I need Thee, oh I need Thee

Every hour I need Thee!

Oh, bless me now, my Savior,

I come to Thee!

Thank you for visiting ~ Reia

The Beatles ~ Help, I Need Somebody!

Have y'all noticed the commercial with the Beatles singing "Help"?  So many memories rush back to me!

1 - I'm so blessed to have grown up when the Beatles were a "thing".  I've tried to relay their importance and music to my children and now to my students.

Photo by Kara Eads on Unsplash

2 - They created so many songs - I can't just choose one to be my "favorite".  Some make me happy, some make me thoughtful and some evoke emotions I can't put my finger on.

3 - During the multiple hours of "Beatles" conversations I've had with my husband over our twenty-plus years together...one of the topics I found most interesting...

... the Beatles created beautiful music and the words didn't matter as much - for me the song would be "Blackbird" - the music is beautiful but the words are, well,... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Kx4xVKo9z8

... or they created beautiful words and the music didn't matter as much (still looking on YouTube for an example).

... or it was just different - "Little Piggies"  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upJB1XZQU0k

... or it just made you happy  "Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da Life Goes On" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_J9NpHKrKMw

and then there were the songs that were perfect in word and music - one would be - "Let It Be" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ra3rF4b6O3E.

I have a lot to say about the music the Beatles created so I'll stop here and write more later.

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

The Songs in My Life ~ Alleluia! Alleluia! Let the Holy Anthems Rise

One thing I've learned in my 14 years of providing music for the Catholic faith - Easter arrives on Saturday night during the Easter Vigil - also called the Paschal Vigil or the Great Vigil of Easter.  It's a service held in traditional Christian churches as the first official celebration of the Resurrection of Jesus.

We begin in darkness - the readings are done with the lights out - we hear Genesis - in the dark - and it's impressive.

I've learned to appreciate and look forward to this celebration.  I've been singing our recessional song all day - "Alleluia!  Alleluia! Let the Holy Anthem Rise".  It's a song of hope, a song of rejoicing!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4r1Ocb0B04

Alleluia, alleluia!

Let the holy anthem rise,

and the choirs of heaven chant it

in the temple of the skies.

Let the mountains skip with gladness

and the joyful valleys ring,

with hosannas in the highest

to our Savior and our King.

May your Paschal Vigil be filled with hope and rejoicing!  He is risen - Alleluia!

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia

The Songs in My Life ~ Behold the Wood

I've discovered as I wind my way through my 14th year as a musician for the Catholic faith...Holy Week is spent walking out the Passion of Christ and I truly love it!

Last night the Altar was stripped and the church was prepared for the sacrifice Jesus offered of himself for my sins.

Tonight we enter in silence and leave in silence.  As a Music Director - I'd really love a quick run through of the songs but...we enter in silence and leave in silence.

We also venerate the cross during the Mass and will be singing this touching song - "Behold the Wood".  "Behold, behold the wood of cross, on which is hung our salvation.  O come, let us adore."

You can hear it now on YouTube (another great video) and tonight when I stream the Mass on the church's FaceBook page. 

Hope your Holy Week journey is full of meaning and meditation.

Thanks for visiting ~ Reia